Trying To Put Out My Dumpster Fire *********************************************************************************** This Stupid Bitch
My mother is crazy. I overheard a convo she had with someone that she was going to go to PR or Mexico with Boomerang in Aug but she was mad at him for whatever. Oh. You were leaving? Were you going to tell me? Considering I would be the one babysitting it would be nice to give me a fucking heads up. What if something happened?! Shit. What if one of my brothers need medical attention? And the doctors all like wheres your mom? Well fuck if I know. I KNEW something was up when she switched our going to MI vacation dates from AUG to JULY. No biggie. I was like Ill give AUG back. She was all like no no dont do that. Leave em open just in case. I gave her the side eye but left em alone. Then I overheard the one time her and Boomerang arguing over what hotels to chose from or some shit. My spidey senses kicked in and I waited for her bitch ass to say something. She never did. And Imma have to confront her. I mean it is still JUNE but still. She did this shit last year and went to MO with Boomerang without saying SHIT. All she told me was that she was gonna hang out with him. When she grabbed my overnight bag I KNEW she was spending the night. She left FRI and came back SUN evening and had no idea why we were pissed. She then got the nerve to get mad at US (especially me) because we cold shouldered her ass. I told her she should have SAID something. She got mad like I tried to check her. Talking about how she grown. BITCH YOU ARE GROWN WITH FUCKING KIDS!! I dont give a damn truly about her going on vacation but a fucking heads up and some planning or letting me in the loop or something would be nice. Who the fuck just ditches their fucking kids to go gallivanting with their fucking boyfriend?! My. Silly. Mother. 8:54 pm - Wednesday, Jun. 17, 2015 *********************************************************************************** I. Am. Wilting.
The family is over along with Boomerang. I can hear everyone outside laughing and I just feel so sad. I dont fit in with them at all. Im not a part of this. She was telling the family that Im her sister and how I get so annoyed with that. She and they laughed it off. Like the years of hiding me and not claiming me was some fucking joke. I dont matter. I feel like a joke. Even when she talks about her kids I dont get credit. They asked her what she missed about MI and she was talking coney dogs. Then she goes the kids got me a kit for my birthday. The family was like really? Where from? She hesitated and was like well phayth did it. She does this shit all the time. The boys rarely get her anything. I bought her running shoes for mothers day. Researched the best ones and everything and she post on facebook how great her kids (i.e. the boys) got her shoes. They dont cook or bake or fucking decorate. I cannot even get money for reimbursement. They dont buy cards. Shes always like my kids my kids my kids. And how she is a proud parent of a bunch of boys and blah blah blah. Then she tells me how she always wanted a sister. I bitch about her being clingy but I am clingy. This family isnt healthy for me. I keep trying and trying and trying. And when I get mad Im like fuck them but I keep trying and trying and trying. I dont feel like myself. I feel empty and weepy and hurt. I already agreed to one more year of homeschool for Bub (8). He does so well. His math is 3rd grade level (he just finished 1st) he can do long addition in his head at a 4th grade level and his reading and comprehension is at 3rd grade. Im glad to help him and have a great foundation for his knowledge that hopefully he'll grow on. But after this I seriously need to leave. This family is killing me. I am wilting in the worst way. I cant find me anymore. 2:43 pm - Saturday, Jun. 13, 2015 *********************************************************************************** Public Bum Bitch Graduates
I am trying to be all rainbows and sunshine. I am trying to be all happy and funny and bubbly. I used to be but I have no idea where that side of me went. Its probably my fucking family. Just saying. So. Tomorrow is Twelve (or was it Eleven? Hes 18) graduation. He is the first one to graduate. Our mother never did cause she had me. So she went the GED route. I also went the GED route. Not that I was pregnant or anything. I didnt like all the rules of high school life. I remember being in middle school wanting to skip high school. I stopped going to high school and was doing my moms college homework just cause. Child number 2, Seventeen (22? 23?) also went the GED route. Mom moved when he had 8 months left of high school and he moved in with me and was crashing at friends houses. He was cool when we had the car but mom took the car back (after I spent 500-600$ getting plates, registration and insurance but I digress) and he refused to take the bus. Child number 3, my sister, ummm Thirteen (??? 19 now) dropped out for whatever reason. Mom moved again. Actually to WI and Thirteen hated it. She has yet to get her GED. So child number 4, Eleven is the first to graduate. Mom invited "family" to the graduation. This is our great gma, great aunts (2 of em) and some cousins or some shit. They arent family to me at all. They are never around. They live like 2/3 hours away and the 5 years my mom lived here she probably saw them once. Shes constantly bitching that she is an orphan. So of course her delusional mind got all emotional at the the thought "family" is coming. Ugh. Anyway they were supposed to show up tomorrow at 1 and now theyre coming at like 10. I find that disrespectful because they KNOW we're going to a graduation. This has been the plan for at least 2 months. Now my mom says she isnt going to see Eleven walk because this "family" is coming out. Eleven brushed it off but he seemed kind of offended and upset which I dont blame him. Mom has been excited and hyping him up just to brush him off cause of this "family". Instead of telling them that 10 isnt going to work because we are going to Elevens graduation she instead is brushing Eleven off because she basically doesnt want to chance this "family" not showing up at all. Which pisses me off. Why do this to Eleven? I tried to say something and she got mad at ME and accused me of being upset and making it about ME. What? Excuse you? This bitch makes me wanna shake her. It is sooooo annoying how she whines and cries that she is an orphan and no one loves her and how she fucking clings to everyone that shows her just the tiniest bit of attention. Shes fucking broken. There is no other way to explain this. But to casually dismiss your son who has been there and ride or die for your ass for some "family" that dont always pick up the fucking phone when you call. Ugh. Just ugh. Then if that wasnt enough she got back with Boomerang. Now. I havent been bothered by this relationship in quite some time. In fact I will brush that bitch off whenever she mentions him. I actually put my foot down and was like dont mention this bum to me. She got upset. The more I ignored her the more she kept trying tell me shit about him. I swear to you she was mentioning him in random conversations. One time we were watching something and a commercial came up and commerical A got cut off by commercial B. I said I always wonder if those people who pay for that get pissed. She launches into this story about how Boomerang is an engineer of whatever sort and he cuts commercials or some shit. Ummm whatevs. Im rambling. Anyway Boomerang doesnt claim her. She will never meet his mom, his kids or any of his family. She met like one or two friends. He will never add her on facebook (although the friends she met did). He doesnt like the fact she has kids. Hes mentioned before if he wins the lotto hes shipping us all to boarding school or some shit cause he would like her to himself for once. I was at work on Sunday. Apparently he added these "dirty bitches" to his facebook. She got upset so posted the only picture she had of them together and ranted on facebook and even tagged him. She pretty much made it public she was his hidden dirty mistress and that she was through. PUBLIC! Then a few days later (well today) she takes him BACK! But bitch you made a PUBLIC declaration of a giant FUCK you and how he HIDES you and that you are THROUGH and you take him back?! I KNOW he aint stalking her like that. This bitch is basically throwing herself at him. Which I kind of suspected for quite some time. Once I realized she wants to be his doormat I stopped being so upset at their relationship. But to do this shit PUBLICALLY?!?! She took down the post but still. Im just fucking speechless. This bum bitch. Its public. Im just embarrassed for real that this is my mom. 9:46 pm - Friday, Jun. 12, 2015 *********************************************************************************** |
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