Trying To Put Out My Dumpster Fire *********************************************************************************** The Season Is Upon Us Buttercup
This is my chitter chatter for the week: Christmas is coming and all that jazz. I like this season with the holly jolly and blah blah blah. We (as in me and mom) strung lights on our outside tree. Its something we've always wanted to do. You know? Be those people. I have noticed as we're stringing lights that her super awesome boyfriend (theyre still together. we just ignore each other. even when i see him i pretend he doesnt exist.) is nowhere to be found. Well I thought of him when she mentioned that my one brother, Seven (??? 14.) didnt want to come out and help us. And how she has lazy boys. Well you know. He probably figured we had it. Hell between me and her we've done a lot of handy stuff. I was super proud of myself a couple months ago when I replaced those string light socket things in our basement. Four (FOUR!) of them had no strings and the strings were pulled in off mode so even with a lightbulb in we couldnt see shit. The basement is dark so I decided to google and order parts since our mom buried her head in the sand. I prayed I didnt electrocute myself when I turned off the power and started working and viola! It was fucking amzeballs. I tried to replace our leaky faucet sink by replacing the piece in the actual faucet but it was so corroded that I snapped the handle off and I have to replace the whole fucking thing now. It is currently on my to do list. The thing still works cause the handle stays on just dont pull it up to high/hard or it comes off. But then you have to just pop it back on. Since I am not a handy man Im not going to get everything right. The toilet was running so I googled that and learned how to lower the water level. Im usually the one that puts furniture together when mom goes on a shopping spree and we have a new kitchen island and dining room table and chairs. When the fish had fucking popeye (grooosssssss) I was the one who googled (groooooosssss) his condition and how to fix him (epsom salt) while mom was hysterically crying cause her "fish son" was dying. Im fucking amazeballs and shes useful as well. So together we get shit done. I can see why Seven thought we could handle it. I have noticed that a lot of projects around the house where she bitches about lazy boys her wonderful boyfriend is nowhere to be found to help her. Its like she bitches she needs a man around the house but then her man who hangs around the house doesnt do anything so I dont understand the bitching. She doesnt take it out on him she takes it out on us. Which I am not the only one to notice that me and my brothers are in agreement that when mom and boomerang fight its best to take cover. I also dont understand the bitching when shes highly capable of doing it herself. I just dont understand the mentality. Its like shes resentful that she has to deal with these things and if only she had a man. Its either realize what an awesome(ish) take charge woman you are OR find a man that is actually useful. Quit bitching. Speaking of that. Im working on not being so fucking negative all the time. Its like I was witty and funny and forever ago I used to have a life. Somewhere I lost my way. Its like Ive compressed my personality to deal with everyone around me. Not that I completely blame myself since my family is fucking dysfunctional and a lot to deal with. Theres so many things that I do that I never ever get credit for and theres things I say or whatever that my mom takes. I can have a witty one liner and my mom will take it and act like its hers. She'll quote me to gma or boomerang or on facebook but Ill never get credit. Cause she wants to look cool or whatever. Or if I come up with a great idea she wants it. For Bubs (8) birthday (coming up) I got him a microscope and glass slides and this book about how the body works and this plaster kit so he can make a skeleton. For Christmas Im getting him a telescope a planets/stars book and this solar system thingy he can put together. Science-y stuff since he likes it. I had this idea back in September. I was googling items and prices and things and I left the page on my computer. Mom saw it and actually tried to put the microscope and telescope in layaway because she didnt actually have the funds. It wouldnt let her online. Thank goodness too since what she was actually trying to do was buy them and get credit for it. I thought it was weird when she mentioned she couldnt put those ideas in layaway. Red flags though when she kept bitching she didnt know what to get him for his birthday and christmas because I bought those things for him. When I tried to show her the things I bought she was so passive aggressive. She kept bitching about it up until this week. Shes getting him these archery things and nerf guns which he likes so shes feeling cool again. Or with baking. Last Christmas we got into it because she felt I was taking over her territory because she wanted to bake fun stuff and all the other bullshit. Shes competing with me for some fucked up reason. Since then I havent baked as much. Usually Im making a lot of bread. Or cookies everywhere. Or different cakes and treats. Normally she has to tell me to stop fucking baking all the time. But since then I just dont feel so good about it. I just dont want to fight anymore. So I let her bake. Her using box mix shit to bake. Her making flat crispy cookies to bake. I gave her the kitchen and let her be a star. This holiday season apparently we're still in competition. She was highly annoyed with me when I listed all the things I wanted to bake/make. Crockpot white hot chocolate. Oreo creme pie. Reese peanutbutter cup cheesecake/pie. Pecan bars. Dark chocolate cream pie. Nothing super fancy. No breads. I only need the oven for the pecan bars (I think Ill have to double check). I held myself back. She was pissy until I dropped the chocolate pie and gave the other two pies to my brothers to make since theyre super easy and she wants everyone in the kitchen this year. Then she decides to add this apple caramel snicker salad shit and this pumpkin cheesecake thing and something else. Since all Im doing are the pecan bars she is currently doing more desserts than I am and shes back to being happy with me again. Sheisty bitch. This is the type of environment that Im chilling in currently. But I know Im moving in the summer. I know freedom is around the corner so I feel good. And because of that I am slowly unfolding my personality. The quirky happy funny side of myself. The side I packed away cause I had to deal with crazy people. But now Im feeling all types of I dont give a fuck. Now I dont want to be bothered by negativity. Now I refuse to be sucked into madness. So my true self is slowly coming out and that makes me happy. 1:06 pm - Friday, Nov. 20, 2015 *********************************************************************************** |
||||||
|
||||||